Rap Battle at First Floor

01Dec09

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment 
You want it, you better never let it go 
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow 
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo 

Not my words readers. The words of notorious dungaree wearer – Eminem. His international movie smash – ‘8 Mile’ – sees him play B-Rabbit, a wannabe rapper from the wrong side of the tracks. Trapped with an alcoholic mother (played by Patricia Routledge) a pregnant girlfriend (Keifer Sutherland) and no way to make any greenhoney-pips (money), his life appears to be careering towards a dead end.

That all changes when he meets Daisy, (Sandra Bullock and Meg Ryan) a kooky environmentalist who puts love first. When her nine year old son Jonah (a hologram of Michael Jackson) twists his brain right up in a snooker accident, she can’t afford to pay for the operation that may just save his life.

If you had once chance, or one opportunity - would you risk it all for love? Contains scenes of a violently sexual nature throughout

In one desperate final gamble, B-Rabbit enters a head-to-head rap contest aiming to win the prize money, save Jonah and finally capture the heart of the only woman he has ever truly loved apart from like this girl he snogged off when he was like ten so it doesn’t even count or whatever.

Inspired by this urban fairy tale, I headed to First Floor on Brunswick Street with my ‘2 live posse be-atch crew’ (Suzanne and Stephen) to watch an MC battle. Each Monday, the resident pro-spittin’ chappy takes on all-comers in a name calling hip hop swaggerfest. I had planned to participate but was worried that I may get dissed as a four-eyes so declined.

Double bass player wonders what to have for dinner

The bar was low-lit, the MC was charismatic, the beer was cheap, the cockroaches were enormous (seriously, I thought it was an ashtray) and the combatants were surprisingly good. I say surprisingly as judging by the ‘waiting to go on stage’ dancing from many of the street gladiators I was anticipating a bit of a car crash. One guy in particular was throwing shapes like a cardigan in a tumble dryer. However, when he hit the stage, his lyrical bullets would have put Richard Blackwood to shame.

With free entry every Monday, a friendly atmos apart from the continual on-stage trading of insults (“I’m a bad ass felon. You look like a melon”), rap battle at First Floor allows you to get ghetto without any silly drive-by killing unpleasantness which just spoils it for the rest of us.

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